I have been thinking a lot about the word 'happy' lately. The dictionary definition is: feeling or showing pleasure or contentment :(happy about) having a sense of confidence in or satisfaction with (a person, arrangement, or situation): ( happy with) satisfied with the quality or standard of. (That is according to the dictionary on my MacBook.)
I have been thinking a lot about happiness lately because I have a lot of friends who are not overly happy at the moment. Life is hard. They are battling a lot of obstacles. They face many great challenges. My life has not always been easy and smooth. I was trying to think of my own happy memories the other day. I realised I focus on the not-so-happy memories more than the happy ones.
Why do we have this obsession with being happy? Are we really supposed to be happy all the time? What if we are not? I do not think happiness is the goal in life. Contentment is. I think the phenomena of happiness is a Western cultural one.
When I lived in Ireland, I met many Nigerians who fled their country as their only hope of surviving. They moved to Ireland where they were not allowed to work for their first year. They lived on assistance. They became disliked by some locals. And yet they were content. They had lost loved ones in fighting. The pastor of the church fled the country one night with 2 of his 3 children and his wife. His third child was home sick with grandma. They were killed. The pastor and his family could not say good bye. They could not bury their beloved child and mother. They had to flee or they would be next. And yet he thought I was amazing because I left Canada to work in inner city Dublin. I told him it was the other way around. He had joy. He had peace. He had hope.
I have been blessed with much in life. My Nigerian friend had not. And yet he had greater joy than I did. He had greater contentment. 'Stuff' can be a great obstacle to enjoying life. When we have it we focus on it. We want to make it fulfill us. Then we want more. We want better. We want bigger. Maybe the 'more' we should be wanting has nothing to do with us. I want more for my neighbours. I want more peace in my neighbourhood. I want more equality for those around me. I want more justice (not punishment or retribution) in the world around me.
This post feels a bit disjointed as I re-read it. I am not against happiness. I just don't think we should judge the quality of our life by how much of it we have. When I stop focusing on things that do not bring joy, peace, contentment and happiness, I am free to look around me and focus on things I can truly impact. I believe then, I will have the peace, contentment, joy and yes, maybe even some happiness. I will keep you posted...
I have been thinking a lot about happiness lately because I have a lot of friends who are not overly happy at the moment. Life is hard. They are battling a lot of obstacles. They face many great challenges. My life has not always been easy and smooth. I was trying to think of my own happy memories the other day. I realised I focus on the not-so-happy memories more than the happy ones.
Why do we have this obsession with being happy? Are we really supposed to be happy all the time? What if we are not? I do not think happiness is the goal in life. Contentment is. I think the phenomena of happiness is a Western cultural one.
When I lived in Ireland, I met many Nigerians who fled their country as their only hope of surviving. They moved to Ireland where they were not allowed to work for their first year. They lived on assistance. They became disliked by some locals. And yet they were content. They had lost loved ones in fighting. The pastor of the church fled the country one night with 2 of his 3 children and his wife. His third child was home sick with grandma. They were killed. The pastor and his family could not say good bye. They could not bury their beloved child and mother. They had to flee or they would be next. And yet he thought I was amazing because I left Canada to work in inner city Dublin. I told him it was the other way around. He had joy. He had peace. He had hope.
I have been blessed with much in life. My Nigerian friend had not. And yet he had greater joy than I did. He had greater contentment. 'Stuff' can be a great obstacle to enjoying life. When we have it we focus on it. We want to make it fulfill us. Then we want more. We want better. We want bigger. Maybe the 'more' we should be wanting has nothing to do with us. I want more for my neighbours. I want more peace in my neighbourhood. I want more equality for those around me. I want more justice (not punishment or retribution) in the world around me.
This post feels a bit disjointed as I re-read it. I am not against happiness. I just don't think we should judge the quality of our life by how much of it we have. When I stop focusing on things that do not bring joy, peace, contentment and happiness, I am free to look around me and focus on things I can truly impact. I believe then, I will have the peace, contentment, joy and yes, maybe even some happiness. I will keep you posted...
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