To Do

I love lists. They keep me focused. They help me remember. They also free up 'thinking space' when I want to remember to do something at a later day or time. It is even better when I remember to take the list with me when I head out to run errands.

I am currently sitting in my little office space at the edge of my dining room. My current to do list is on the kitchen counter not four feet away. Yet as it sits there I have a pang of guilt sitting here checking out social media. I am on a roll getting things done. The floors are swept and mopped. Laundry is in the dryer almost done. Dishes are clean. I even started work on a Pinterest project I have been meaning to do for the last six months. It is a beautiful day outside and a part of me feels guilty for being inside.

Then I started to think about 'to do'. There is a lot of pressure in life some times to do. We need to do more to help those in need. We need to do more with our friends. We need to do more to make sure we spend time with family. We need to do more volunteering. We need to do more in our homes to make them perfect.

A part of the reason I am sitting writing this is to ignore my to do list for a few minutes. It is not the boss of this house or my day. It is merely a tool to help me remember the things I need or want to get done. This is not a test. I am not being timed. No one will suffer if I stop for a few moments. So I will sit, write, and drink tea.

Yet how often to do we allow our own, often unwritten or unspoken, to do lists take over? It is good to have goals. Objectives are positive. Even a long term plan is a good thing. Yet life happens and it is often unpredictable. Also, you are only one person with only one life. You matter too. Not your list of accomplishments. Not how many books you've read. Not how many people you know. Not how much money you make. You. You matter. You also need to be sustained.

I sometimes wonder how many people are paralysed in life by fear of not completing items on their personal to do list? How often do we look at others around us and assume they have the perfect life? How often do we compare ourselves to people we barely know? When we do that, we might unknowingly add more things to our to do list. We might think because someone we know is finishing a degree, or receiving an award, or has a great new job, that we need to suddenly do something award worthy, or go back to school, or find a new job.

We do not. Well, we do not simply because others do. When we give ourselves the freedom to live our lives the way we were meant to, it can be incredibly freeing. Not comparing ourselves to others is an amazing, life giving way to live.

In church this morning the sermon was about trust. Trusting God. Don't worry, I am not going to preach here. The person speaking talked about how often life does not go the way we planned. Or even the way we hoped. I know many of my friends have said, and I felt the same at times, they did not think they would be where they are at this age. Sometimes that is a very difficult thing to realize and acknowledge. Other times it can be a gift. If we stop letting others write our to do list, maybe we can see that our lives have some hope, joy, peace, and love. If you were meant to live the life of someone else, you would be someone else.

Here is to freedom. Here is to enjoying life. Here is to being the people we are meant to be.

Now, back to my to do list.