A wee bit of BS

My dad died just over 6 years ago. I had a deep relationship with him I have never experienced with anyone else. I used to think if he ever died, I would too. Clearly I have managed to survive. His loss was the deepest I have ever felt. His leaving created many holes in my heart and life. Suddenly I didn't have anyone who 'needed' to hear from me regularly. I didn't have anyone as generous. Christmas became nothing to me. My family floundered for a while after that and we had to redefine what was important to us. How would we celebrate? How would we create new memories? What was really important now? I love getting older but do not like my birthday day. It is three weeks before Christmas. My dad started a tradition when I was in high school of sending me flowers for my birthday. Even when I lived in Ireland I received them. I was wonderfully surprised for a few years after my dad's passing to have friends give me flowers on my birthday. This year I h...

I have to admit I love snow! I didn't love it as much as when I moved back from Dublin, Ireland years ago. Lately it has been snowing here a lot. I am enjoying it! I love sitting in my cozy home watching snow falling outside. I also enjoy shovelling. I suppose I should get proper winter boots. : ) Something else giving me joy lately is my new job. I started as a Coordinator for a local group that does research for other groups and organizations. It is a group made up of local residents. The hope is to create jobs and build community. JUst when I think I have found the most perfect job, life changes and I find yet another step up. This job is only part time and temporary. However, in a matter of two days I have been able to offer support and organization to this wonderful group of people trying to make their lives better as well as the lives of those around them. Some days my heart breaks at the poverty and loss of those around me. I wish I could just make things better...

I have moved into my very first house. I LOVE it! It is a beautiful house in the area I love. My street is great and I am thinking I will need to put up more Christmas lights. I have enjoyed settling into my home and love having people over. I moved in after my last day at my job. What a crazy transition to make in life. The time off work has been healing. I may finally be rested and relaxed. I am not worried about work. I will get a job easily enough. I may have one lined up early into next year. I was beginning to worry a bit about the time between then. A dear friend suggested my name to a local community group as a possible candidate for a part time position they have for five months. One of the women phoned asking for my resume. I sent it in and did not hear a thing. Today the other woman hiring for the position phoned me and I have my interview tomorrow. I have not had an interview for a while. It will be interesting. I am not worried. I know who I am. I know ...

Well it is Friday night. It felt as though my last two weeks at the Cafe would go on and on. Yet here I am a week after my last day. How time flies. I have moved into my very own house. I love it! It is a sanctuary to me. So far I am not worried about the mortgage. I am not worried about what job will be next. The past two weeks have been filled with rather amazing things. My God is amazing. He is amazing because He uses me, of all people, in amazing ways. I met with the Mayor last week and the woman who is his major contender in the upcoming election today. I am being listened to and respected by both. I can not tell you how humbling this is. I am just an ordinary person going about my life. I simply speak up when things seem wrong or unjust. I believe I have a certain wisdom that has come through life experiences. I am not better or smarter than others. I am just different. Growing up, apparently, I used to ask my mum two questions constantly. They made her crazy. ...

Today was my last day at the Ellice Cafe. It has been a full day. I also had a visit at City Hall. As I walked to City Hall just after noon I thought back to how I felt leaving Starbucks to go work there. I was so excited and hopeful and nervous. But I knew it was the right thing to do. It was the best place for me to go. It was the right job for me to take. I was going to love it. I would work hard and do the unexpected. I believe I did. It was a LOT of hard work. Some days were almost unbearable. But most days were absolutely delightful. Some things broke my heart. I hate seeing people in poverty. I hate seeing people living with addictions. I hate seeing people in poverty or living with addictions ignored by society around them. Some times I was tough. Some times I was not. But I tried, all the time, to be loving. There is no where else I know quite like the Ellice Cafe. The Board of New Life Ministries took a chance hiring me. I am glad they did. Now, clearly ...

Sigh. What a day. What a week. It is only Tuesday. When I started this week I certainly did not expect it to go like this. Yes, I am only two days in. However, that is two days down and three to go. I am buying a house, transitioning out of a job, trying to get yoga started for free in the West End (with the help of two amazing women!) and trying to keep it all straight in my head. I told a regular at the Cafe today I basically complete a triathlon in my head every day. I have insurance papers signed. I need to get laundry done. I have funds being transferred into accounts. I have to go back to the lawyer's office yet. I am getting things done at work. I am trying to 'train' someone (to temporarily take my place) who is only in when it works for his schedule and it does not really matter what I'm doing when he comes by. I have most of my stuff packed. I have a lot more to pack yet. I have bedding for my new bed. I need to find paint for the bedroom. I h...

Wow, what a day. I am honestly still in a bit of shock. I am in the last two weeks of my current job. It is a job I have loved and worked hard at. I love my staff. They truly bring me joy. They are witty, funny, kind, gracious, forgiving, understanding, hard working, caring and I could go on and on. I can not express enough how blessed I am to know them. For the past two and a half years I have run a small Cafe in the West End of Winnipeg. It is not the greatest area of the city but I love it. Customers at the Cafe are made up of white collar, blue collar and no collar. I love them all. They are witty, funny, kind, gracious, forgiving, understanding, caring and I could go on and on. However, my time is come to an end there. Yes, somewhat unexpectedly to me. But as I think about it, they why is not nearly as important as the how. The how you may ask? Yes, how. How do I exit well? How do I set things up to the best of my ability so all these people I care so much about do...